it happened after my backpacking trip this summer. my two big toenails, protesting the abuse, bruised, turned black, and slowly made their way off my toes. i understand. i didn't fully brief them as to what to expect in terms of miles and harsh conditions. but in my defense, i didn't know what to expect either. in any event, the toenails left. i've grown two others in their absence, and, frankly, i like them better anyway. so there.
then, after the 10K in corvallis, i developed a blister underneath another toenail. not sure quite how that happened, i think my toenail was a little long and it bumped against my shoe. i cared for the blister in hopes of not losing another toenail. toenails, you may have noticed, grow very slowly. and it's sandal weather. one thing i can say about the other toenails, at least they had the decency to leave during the part of the year when the horror could be hidden within stylish footwear.
yesterday at work, i moved to tuck my foot up underneath me, caught my toenail on my chair and POP off it came. no pain, no blood. but freakishly ugly nonetheless. i looked at my toe and found an empty bed where my toenail once lived. in a quick sweep of the area, i found the nail on my chair. i briefly examined it for any religious markings that might make it an ebay sensation, thereby making me rich and famous for my lady of guadalupe toenail. but it was just an ordinary nail. and disembodied toenails are creepy.
after that first run, i researched a little about what runners do to prevent blisters during longer runs. the strategies run from absolutely nothing, to wearing women's nylons underneath socks, to soaking their feet in a vat of warm nutella. okay, i made that last one up, but my point is the answers are as varied as the number of feet that run. for bloomsday, i took some of the advice, liberally applying rosebud salve (a fancy-pants vaseline-type substance) thickly to my feet and covering them with socks. in the shower the morning of the race, i washed my feet thoroughly and dried them, then applied more rosebud salve in between each toe to reduce the friction that causes blisters. i even convinced a slightly skeptical kenny to try this - and that involved him de-shoeing when he was all ready to run. but i gotta tell ya, longer run and nary a blister. brother is now a believer as well.
lubrication, my friend, it ain't just for...engines.
alas, that doesn't save my topless toe. so i gave myself a pedi last night, and painted the skin where the toenail should be. it looks, well, like painted skin where a toenail should be. but from 5'6" away, i can't really tell.
enjoy the closeup of my bulbous toes, pre-pedi.
9 comments:
hey kenyan, mom and dad - i'm looking at my giant toes, and they are reminding me of something... anyone care to guess what?
Too easy, sis. How about those hills on the Washington side of the Columbia...henceforth to remind me of my sister and blisters and Bloomsday. No more giants.
YES! across from the large black sheep ;-)
sister rhymes with blister. coincidence or conspiracy?
i'd know those toes anywhere. you know, after a year or so of doing "this little piggy went to market" on them.
that tickles!!!
I think we share some genes or something; those ugly, bulbous phalanges look oddly familiar.
does your pinky toe curl and lay on its side like a small boiled shrimp?
Q: Does your pinky toe curl and lay on its side like a small boiled shrimp?
A: Yes.
Other interesting trivia about my toes: just like me pappy, my index toes are the longest and have a circumference near the tip nearly twice that of their circumference along the rest of the toe. Also on my index toes, the toenail points up and out at about a 45 degree angle. All my other toenails lie flat. Harder than hell to trim. Karyn hates these particular toenails for obvious reasons. Every pair of socks I have, there is a hole worn over these two toes.
hey, enough already of the toe talk. toenails, blisters, shrimp toes! it's starting to stink up the site.
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